Daily Chuckle

i7win7

Well-known member

Equipment
BX2370, B2650 grapple, tree puller, trailer mover, 3 point hoist, mower, tiller
Feb 21, 2020
3,168
3,626
113
Central, IL
The weather forecast was for partly cloudy
partly cloudy.jpg
 
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DustyRusty

Well-known member

Equipment
BX23S
Nov 8, 2015
4,952
3,691
113
North East CT
Beer bottle; "you break me and you get a year of bad luck!"


Mirror; "Hah... you break ME and you get 7 years of bad luck!!"


Condom; "You, hey.... seriously??" (shakes head and walks off laughing)
 

DustyRusty

Well-known member

Equipment
BX23S
Nov 8, 2015
4,952
3,691
113
North East CT
A gas station in Kentucky was trying to increase its sales, so the owner put up a sign saying, "Free Sex with Fill-Up".

Soon a local redneck pulled in, filled his tank, and then asked for his free sex.

The owner told him to pick a number from 1 to 10. If he guessed correctly, he would get his free sex.

The redneck then guessed 8, and the proprietor said, "You were close. The number was 7. Sorry, no sex this time."

A week later, the same redneck, along with a buddy, Bubba, pulled in
for a fill-up. Again, he asked for his free sex.
The proprietor again gave him the same story, and asked him to guess
the correct number.

The redneck guessed 2 this time. Again, the proprietor said, "Sorry,
it was 3. You were close, but no free sex this time."

As they were driving away, the redneck said to his buddy, "I think
that game is rigged and he doesn't really give away free sex."

Bubba replied, "No it ain't, Billy Ray. It ain't rigged ----- my wife won twice last week."
 
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i7win7

Well-known member

Equipment
BX2370, B2650 grapple, tree puller, trailer mover, 3 point hoist, mower, tiller
Feb 21, 2020
3,168
3,626
113
Central, IL
I think my owner voted for Biden
cruel.jpeg
 
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i7win7

Well-known member

Equipment
BX2370, B2650 grapple, tree puller, trailer mover, 3 point hoist, mower, tiller
Feb 21, 2020
3,168
3,626
113
Central, IL
Girlfriend helped me sight in a new rifle -- she might be a keeper

gun stand.jpg
 
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Magicman

Well-known member
Lifetime Member

Equipment
M4900 Utility Special 4WD e/w FEL & 1530 John Deere "Traveling Man"
Oct 8, 2019
5,058
6,438
113
80
Brookhaven, MS
knotholesawmill.com
To all my friends using Viagra

I knew it. . . I knew it......
I knew they would finally release the ingredients in Viagra:

3% Vitamin E
2% Aspirin
2% Ibuprofen
1% Vitamin C
5% Spray Starch
87% Fix-A-Flat
 

D2Cat

Well-known member
Lifetime Member

Equipment
L305DT, B7100HST, TG1860, TG1860D, L4240
Mar 27, 2014
12,895
4,263
113
40 miles south of Kansas City
They have a name for when they remove their masks after getting out doors. They call it an "AIRgasm". That first breath of fresh air after wearing the mask for however long.
I'd say it's perfect !
 
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i7win7

Well-known member

Equipment
BX2370, B2650 grapple, tree puller, trailer mover, 3 point hoist, mower, tiller
Feb 21, 2020
3,168
3,626
113
Central, IL
You see some interesting things in the bigger cities
city life.jpg
 

i7win7

Well-known member

Equipment
BX2370, B2650 grapple, tree puller, trailer mover, 3 point hoist, mower, tiller
Feb 21, 2020
3,168
3,626
113
Central, IL
Could be worse, could be cleaning out a wood chipper
clean out.jpg
 
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Fordtech86

Well-known member
Lifetime Member

Equipment
L3200
Aug 7, 2018
4,705
5,474
113
Pineville,LA
Two guys on their first building project nailing down plywood on a roof. Every so often Earl takes a nail out of his apron and throws it over the edge. After a while Jim Bob asks him what he’s doing. “Them nails have the point on the wrong end.” “You dumb axe Earl responds Jim Bob, them are for the other side of the roof.”
 

bmblank

Well-known member

Equipment
2020 L3901HST, LA525 Loader, 66" Q/A Bucket, PFL2042 Forks, Meteor SB68PT Blower
Mar 4, 2015
624
268
63
Cadillac, MI
Two guys on their first building project nailing down plywood on a roof. Every so often Earl takes a nail out of his apron and throws it over the edge. After a while Jim Bob asks him what he’s doing. “Them nails have the point on the wrong end.” “You dumb axe Earl responds Jim Bob, them are for the other side of the roof.”
Ha. I've always made the joke about my spoon being inside out, but I've never heard that one before.
 

Magicman

Well-known member
Lifetime Member

Equipment
M4900 Utility Special 4WD e/w FEL & 1530 John Deere "Traveling Man"
Oct 8, 2019
5,058
6,438
113
80
Brookhaven, MS
knotholesawmill.com
Little Johnny is at it again-


The teacher asked the class to use the word 'fascinate' in a sentence.

Molly put up her hand and said, 'My family went to my granddad's farm, and we all saw his pet sheep. It was fascinating.'

The teacher said, 'That was good, but I wanted you to use the word 'fascinate, not fascinating'.

Sally raised her hand. She said, 'My family went to see Rock City and I was 'fascinated.' The teacher said, 'Well,
That was good Sally, but I wanted you to use the word 'fascinate.'

Little Johnny raised his hand. The teacher hesitated because she had been burned by Little Johnny before.

She finally decided there was no way he could damage the word 'fascinate', so she called on him.

Johnny said, 'My aunt Gina has a sweater with ten buttons, but her boobs are so big she can only fasten eight.'

The teacher sat down and cried.
 
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i7win7

Well-known member

Equipment
BX2370, B2650 grapple, tree puller, trailer mover, 3 point hoist, mower, tiller
Feb 21, 2020
3,168
3,626
113
Central, IL
What would a city slicker need a wheelbarrow for?
Us country boys don't need no cart
buying wheelbarrow.jpg
 
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i7win7

Well-known member

Equipment
BX2370, B2650 grapple, tree puller, trailer mover, 3 point hoist, mower, tiller
Feb 21, 2020
3,168
3,626
113
Central, IL
Guess he should have taken the "back" roads
busted.jpg