Daily Chuckle

[Sidekick]

 

[dirtydeed]

 

[Sidekick]

 

[mikester]

 

[dirtydeed]

 

[Magicman]

 

[Daylight]

 

[D2Cat]

 

[PHPaul]

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You been spying on me?

 

[dirtydeed]

 

[Magicman]

 

[Bmyers]

View attachment 155349

Yes, but only as an apparition of myself.

 

[Old_Paint]

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It's real, trust me. I've seen it in Australia. They do have some ripper names for stuff that simply wouldn't fly here.

 

[Magicman]

 

[Old_Paint]

I had some doozies back in the day. 78 Corolla that would do 0-50 in about 4 miles. It would almost change lanes with the amount of slop in the steering. Baby blue and resembled the murf mobile from Wayne's world.

Pontiac sunfire that would stall if you didn't feather the gas when coming to a stop.

65 belair. Should have never sold that car.

85 Chevy sportside.

Volkswagen fox. This was actually a fun car.

Nissan pickup. Purchased for $300. Looked like it sat in a field for 12 years. Had 200k miles on it when i bought it. Cleaned all the change out from under the seats and hauled it off to the bank. Recieved $350 The dude i bought the truck from ended up paying me $50 to take it off his hands.

94 ford ranger regular cab (gorilla in a clown car)

98 Isuzu amigo. That was fun, soft top plus a sun roof.

2004 ford f150 regular cab.

2009 gmc 1500 extended cab

2016 Gmc 1500 Sierra crew cab.

1968 Opel Kadette Station Wagon (the real babe magnet aka shaggin wagon) My FIRST car.
1970 VW Beetle. Probably wasn't a single bolt on it that I didn't hold in my hand at least once.
1976 Mercury Monarch. Decent car, but couldn't keep a water pump on it and the silver paint fell off.
1982 Buick Skylark (company car #1). Quick, but the trans took a dump after hitting a rock in a strip mine.
1984 Chevy Celebrity (Company Car #2). That car should have been yellow and couldn't get out of it's own way.
1986 Ford Thunderbird. Turned into two of 'em. My favorite T-birds
1988 Ford Taurus. (Company Car #3) Rod bearing bolt broke while I was washing it. Figure that one out.
1992 Ford Taurus. (Company Car #4). Good car until I nearly broke it in half
1992 Ford F-150, V8 5-speed, odd XLT trim with stripes from the front wheel well back around the tailgate.
1998 Ford Ranger (Different Company vehicle #1). GREAT little truck that drove like a sports car.
2005 Chevy Venture (needed a people mover for the missus)
2004 Chevy Impala (Back with first employer in 2007, Hand-me-down Company Car #5)
2008 Chevy Impala (Company Car #6) Looked EXACTLY like the 2004, deer hit it at 750 miles on the odo.
2014 Ford F-150 (Last company car with first employer before being sold like used farm equipment to a European company) Still have that truck.
2019 Chevy Traverse (Missus needed a new people mover)

 

[Daren Todd]

1968 Opel Kadette Station Wagon (the real babe magnet aka shaggin wagon) My FIRST car.
1970 VW Beetle. Probably wasn't a single bolt on it that I didn't hold in my hand at least once.
1976 Mercury Monarch. Decent car, but couldn't keep a water pump on it and the silver paint fell off.
1982 Buick Skylark (company car #1). Quick, but the trans took a dump after hitting a rock in a strip mine.
1984 Chevy Celebrity (Company Car #2). That car should have been yellow and couldn't get out of it's own way.
1986 Ford Thunderbird. Turned into two of 'em. My favorite T-birds
1988 Ford Taurus. (Company Car #3) Rod bearing bolt broke while I was washing it. Figure that one out.
1992 Ford Taurus. (Company Car #4). Good car until I nearly broke it in half
1992 Ford F-150, V8 5-speed, odd XLT trim with stripes from the front wheel well back around the tailgate.
1998 Ford Ranger (Different Company vehicle #1). GREAT little truck that drove like a sports car.
2005 Chevy Venture (needed a people mover for the missus)
2004 Chevy Impala (Back with first employer in 2007, Hand-me-down Company Car #5)
2008 Chevy Impala (Company Car #6) Looked EXACTLY like the 2004, deer hit it at 750 miles on the odo.
2014 Ford F-150 (Last company car with first employer before being sold like used farm equipment to a European company) Still have that truck.
2019 Chevy Traverse (Missus needed a new people mover)

You must have had the v6 in your ranger. I had a 94 Ford ranger with the 4 cyl, 5 speed. That thing was a slug you had to red line it in each gear for it to get out of its own way, let alone someone else's

Did drive and shift really nice though

 

[Magicman]

Yesterday, I stopped by my local TSC store to grab a big bag of dog food for my loyal livestock guardian.
As I was waiting in line at the checkout, a woman behind me looked at the bag and asked,
“Do you have a dog?”
Now, I could’ve just said yes…
But I’m retired—and that means I have *plenty* of time to mess with people.
So I said, with a perfectly straight face:
**“No. I’m starting the Dog Diet again.”**
Her eyebrows went straight up.
I continued,
“It worked great last time—I lost 10 pounds! But I ended up in the hospital. Woke up in the ICU with tubes in both arms and machines beeping all around me.”
At this point, the whole line was listening.
“The diet’s easy. You just carry a few pieces of dog kibble in your pockets, and whenever you feel hungry—you eat one. It’s nutritionally balanced, so… perfect for weight loss.”
She looked horrified and asked:
**“Did the dog food poison you?”**
I shook my head:
**“No… I stepped off the curb to sniff an Irish Setter’s butt and got hit by a car.”**
The guy behind her was doubled over, and I swear the cashier couldn’t breathe from laughing.
Pretty sure I’m not allowed back in that store.
**Moral of the story?**
Never ask a retired person a simple question—we’ve got all the time in the world to give you *the answer you didn’t expect.*

 

[RCW]

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Weather Guy on television said 31 of the last 35 weekends we've had snow or rain.....that's 9 months' worth.....

Thankfully, we haven't had the severe weather that some folks have had. Wish them all well.

 

[RCW]

View attachment 155219

When I was in forestry school, there were some trees/plants you could only properly identify by their taste/smell.

A classmate got so he chewed on everything.

Worked okay until he shoved a bunch of Poison Ivy in his mouth......

He got a ride in an ambulance for that one....