Have you found a really funny review on amazon? These are just a few I have found. Found this for sugar free gummi bears from Haribo.
This, is my story. I used to just be normal , then I found this… this beautiful bag of sugar free gummy bears. Little did I know that they would change my life, and not for the better. Like many, I’ve seen the graphic sugar-free gummy bear reviews. I thought they were just people with a lot of extra time on their hands. I was entirely unaware of the physical toll this would take on my life.
As you have probably assumed, I bought a bag, ignorantly, I ate half the bag as soon as they arrived, not wanting to give myself any chance at a favorable day. Approximately three hours later, Ragnarok
began, starting as just a low gurgling as my insides turned to magma waiting to be released. I was just watching Parks and Rec when the first eruption came forth from my unsuspecting bowels. I shot off the couch and into the bathroom just in time to save my boxers from being torn in two, the force of the fluid spewing from within nearly hurled me from the porcelain throne.
The aftershocks were enough to wound any mortal man, as i used wipe after wipe, it was as if I had sprung a leak, I almost used a mirror to checkup on my poor anus when the dripping finally ceased. I walked out cockily because I thought I had beaten the Hell Bears.
Around thirty minutes later, when playing Quick Play in Overwatch, the gastric fumes began to escape, signaling another appointment with the facilities. This time, I screamed, “Fire in the hole!” before another attack on my now sensitive rectum, just when I thought my second battle was over, a tsunami flooded through what felt like the eye of a needle.
Obviously, I had had enough of the pain these Bears had wrought when as soon as I sat down again, a sharp pain hit me in the pelvic region, and I knew that this was going to be the worst evacuation of them all. When I sat down any other man might have cried like a kindergartener who got the white crayon, the sheer velocity with which my body expelled this putrid elixir would have put a ray of light to shame.
At this point, I was sick and tired of the way these Bears of pure hatred had treated me, so I ejected what I thought was the last of the Potion of Death from my cavities. It wasn’t. later that night, I was finishing up my delightful dinner, with the Bears behind me and nothing but sunshine and lollipops ahead when I felt a knock in the depths of my intestines. Thinking it was nothing I ignored it; that was the wrong choice. Less than a minute later, I bolted to the bathroom… occupied, thankfully, I was fast enough to run to a spot in which I still have nightmares ,my parent’s restroom. This was one of the worst days of my life, I will forever remember the day my G.I. tract disappeared. That was my story. I hope to never have to read yours, for your sake.
All in all ,pretty good texture, okay taste. However ,colonic cleansing wise, ten out of ten, five stars.
This, is my story. I used to just be normal , then I found this… this beautiful bag of sugar free gummy bears. Little did I know that they would change my life, and not for the better. Like many, I’ve seen the graphic sugar-free gummy bear reviews. I thought they were just people with a lot of extra time on their hands. I was entirely unaware of the physical toll this would take on my life.
As you have probably assumed, I bought a bag, ignorantly, I ate half the bag as soon as they arrived, not wanting to give myself any chance at a favorable day. Approximately three hours later, Ragnarok
began, starting as just a low gurgling as my insides turned to magma waiting to be released. I was just watching Parks and Rec when the first eruption came forth from my unsuspecting bowels. I shot off the couch and into the bathroom just in time to save my boxers from being torn in two, the force of the fluid spewing from within nearly hurled me from the porcelain throne.
The aftershocks were enough to wound any mortal man, as i used wipe after wipe, it was as if I had sprung a leak, I almost used a mirror to checkup on my poor anus when the dripping finally ceased. I walked out cockily because I thought I had beaten the Hell Bears.
Around thirty minutes later, when playing Quick Play in Overwatch, the gastric fumes began to escape, signaling another appointment with the facilities. This time, I screamed, “Fire in the hole!” before another attack on my now sensitive rectum, just when I thought my second battle was over, a tsunami flooded through what felt like the eye of a needle.
Obviously, I had had enough of the pain these Bears had wrought when as soon as I sat down again, a sharp pain hit me in the pelvic region, and I knew that this was going to be the worst evacuation of them all. When I sat down any other man might have cried like a kindergartener who got the white crayon, the sheer velocity with which my body expelled this putrid elixir would have put a ray of light to shame.
At this point, I was sick and tired of the way these Bears of pure hatred had treated me, so I ejected what I thought was the last of the Potion of Death from my cavities. It wasn’t. later that night, I was finishing up my delightful dinner, with the Bears behind me and nothing but sunshine and lollipops ahead when I felt a knock in the depths of my intestines. Thinking it was nothing I ignored it; that was the wrong choice. Less than a minute later, I bolted to the bathroom… occupied, thankfully, I was fast enough to run to a spot in which I still have nightmares ,my parent’s restroom. This was one of the worst days of my life, I will forever remember the day my G.I. tract disappeared. That was my story. I hope to never have to read yours, for your sake.
All in all ,pretty good texture, okay taste. However ,colonic cleansing wise, ten out of ten, five stars.
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