Daily Chuckle

olthumpa

Active member
Lifetime Member

Equipment
L275
May 25, 2011
1,501
2
38
Maine
40 percent of food in the United States today is wasted
60 percent goes to waist
 

D2Cat

Well-known member
Lifetime Member

Equipment
L305DT, B7100HST, TG1860, TG1860D, L4240
Mar 27, 2014
12,901
4,269
113
40 miles south of Kansas City
What's wrong with that? He isn't going to hit any mail boxes with his ladder. He's thinking ahead!:D

I have to edit that. Upon further review maybe the right side in not high enough to clear mail boxes.
 
Last edited:

sawmill

Active member

Equipment
bx24 backhoe/fel, 48" Bush mower
Nov 16, 2014
555
91
28
ione, washington
Frank and Dianne were in a local shopping center just before Christmas.
Dianne suddenly noticed that Frank was missing, and as they had a lot
to do, she called him on his cell phone. Dianne asked, "Frank, where
are you? You know that we have lots to do."

Frank said, "Do you remember the jewelry store we went into about 10
years ago, and you fell in love with a diamond necklace? I could not
afford it at the time, and I said that one day I would get it for you."

Little tears started to flow down Dianne's cheek, and she got all choked up. "Yes, I do remember that shop," she replied with emotion.

"Well honey, I'm in Hooters next to that jewelry store."
 

D2Cat

Well-known member
Lifetime Member

Equipment
L305DT, B7100HST, TG1860, TG1860D, L4240
Mar 27, 2014
12,901
4,269
113
40 miles south of Kansas City
I'm not a user of Facebook so I don't know how it works. May wife saw this this morning and was giggling when I asked her what was so funny. So she emailed it to me.

I think it happened in Texas. I think there must have been a FB picture the person posted to see who might know them.

"ATTENTION:
To the punk who tried to steal our Christmas lights last night.....you dropped your phone while you were still logged into Facebook... I don't have to call the cops if you come back and let me talk to you...I'd rather just find out why, and avoid putting someone in jail for a failed attempt at theft. Here's the profile link to their Facebook... Does anyone local know who this is??? "
 

skeets

Well-known member

Equipment
BX 2360 /B2601
Oct 2, 2009
14,094
2,755
113
SW Pa
One Monday morning a mailman is walking the neighborhood on his usual route. As he approaches one of the homes he noticed that both cars were in the driveway. His wonder was cut short by Bob, the homeowner, coming out with a load of empty beer and liquor bottles. "Wow Bob, looks like you guys had one hell of a party last night." the mailman comments.

Bob in obvious pain replies, "Actually we had it Saturday night. This is the first I have felt like moving since 4:00 am Sunday morning. We had about fifteen couples from around the neighborhood over for Christmas Cheer and it got a bit wild. Hell, we got so drunk around midnight that we started playing WHO AM I."

The mailman thinks a moment and says, "How do you play that?"

Well all the guys go in the bedroom and we come out one at a time with a sheet covering us and only our "privates" showing through a hole in the sheet. Then the women try to guess who it is."

The mailman laughs and says, "Damn, I'm sorry I missed that."

Probably a good thing you did," Bob responds. "Your name came up four or five times."
 

skeets

Well-known member

Equipment
BX 2360 /B2601
Oct 2, 2009
14,094
2,755
113
SW Pa
As a matter of fact I was,,, for about 89 days ,, was never so happy to be fired from a job in my life
 

DThrash

Member
Lifetime Member

Equipment
7030SU MX 4700
Sep 29, 2015
184
1
18
Eutaw AL
Studies show that women who put on a few pounds during the holidays live longer than their husbands that mention it.
 

skeets

Well-known member

Equipment
BX 2360 /B2601
Oct 2, 2009
14,094
2,755
113
SW Pa
Shaun I figure I ll find the same thing I found last year,,,,,the bills :eek:
 

DaTow'd

Active member

Equipment
what ever it takes to get the job done
Aug 13, 2013
183
150
43
Bella Coma BC Canada
Grandma and Grandpa were visiting their kids overnight. When Grandpa
found a bottle of Viagra in his son's medicine cabinet, he asked about using
one of the pills.

The son said, "I don't think you should take one Dad; they're very strong
and very expensive".

"How much?" asked Grandpa.

"$10.00 a pill," answered the son.

"I don't care," said Grandpa, "I'd still like to try one, and before we
leave in the morning, I'll put the money under the pillow."

Later the next morning, the son found $110.00 under the pillow. He
called Grandpa and said, "I told you each pill was $10.00, not $110.00."

"I know," said Grandpa. "The hundred is from Grandma."
 

Newlyme

Active member
Lifetime Member

Equipment
M4900 w/loader, finish mower, tiller, auger, rake. BX24 w/loader, backhoe
May 27, 2015
632
62
28
Nelson Ohio USA
Here's one for Pearl Harbor Day.

I was told it's a true story.

A number of years after the war a comercial air liner landed at the Berlin Airport and made a wrong turn onto the taxiway and the young fella in the tower went off on the pilot. "What are you doing haven't you ever been to Berlin before?" The pilot radio'd back, "Yes son I have been to Berlin a few times it's just that we never landed!"

Thank you to all of our Veterans